


Keep Your Hands Where I Can See 'Em

by thehollowones



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Drabble, Eating Disorders, F/M, One Shot, Sad, Sad Sam, Stanford Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-18
Updated: 2016-02-18
Packaged: 2018-05-21 12:57:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6052429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thehollowones/pseuds/thehollowones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Home is the most beautiful lie he has ever told.</p><p>Sam has difficulty adjusting to his life at Stanford.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keep Your Hands Where I Can See 'Em

The first time Jess cooks Sam dinner, he cuts his portions in half. Half his meal is cut into ten bite-sized pieces per food group and half is pushed as far across the plate as he dares. Jess’s cheeks take on a scarlet tinge, even before she starts in on the wine. Beneath the table, Sam’s foot taps out a staccato rhythm. He only stills when he is killing something.

Jess, all wide eyed Midwestern beauty, cannot understand what it’s like to be so ashamed of your own subsistence.

The parameters of their relationship are as follows: Sam will not make fun of Jess’s favorite television show, no matter how much _Dr. Sexy_ makes his chest tighten. Sam will not go for runs that stretch into the early hours of the morning. Sam will not buy apple pies and leave them to fur with mould in the refrigerator.

Jess will not make sudden movements.

When Sam’s heart begins to beat out _Dean, Dean, Dean_ , he catalogues all the ways he could kill a man with only the contents of whatever room of his home he is standing in. Home, he thinks, is a place where he has never had to put his fist through a wall. Home is the most beautiful lie he has ever told.

Jess leaves pamphlets for support groups by the kitchen sink.

For Sam’s birthday, Jess refuses to take him to a bar. Sam likes bars. They are loud and warm and filled with people who are only pretending to be dangerous. Jess likes restaurants, the pricier and quieter the better. Places where she can see Sam’s hands shake in soft, buttery light when she tells him she loves him, and he cannot pretend not to hear her over the hum of a bar fight.

Jess squeezes his hand over the table top, eyes shining with something akin to proprietary joy.

Sam’s heart beats out _Dean, Dean, Dean._

Jess tells him she loves him.

Sam cuts his portions in half.

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own the rights to these characters.


End file.
